Unraveled

I hate these thoughts,
despise my own admissions,
Disdain my lots,
Bitter towards regretful commissions.

What have I done here, Im so messed up,
Why do I still fear, as if your'e not enough
why do I dive in, when I know I'll only break my neck,
like I havent done that yet, so much that I regret, when I'm lyin in bed,
so many thoughts fill my head, and I come unraveled. Hem me in, above and below,
behind and before, Im disheveled and unraveled.

I can't stand myself,
or bear my own reflection,
I know that I really need some help,
Im just so stuck up to correction,
pride is an addiction,
pride is an affliction,
Pride is broken shins,
on cracked pavement,
Where do I lose myself,
to find to it,
where to I erase my life
to define it.